Tuesday, April 17, 2012

still here

Quick update for those following along closely...
Baby girl is still here with us.  I packed up much of her stuff to take with us yesterday to court just in case... but the judge denied the kinship placement so she's still ours for now.
I'm thinking this relative might still try to make some (long term) changes and try for guardianship again later down the road, but we'll see.

In the meantime (and I don't know if this might be more information than I should share, but for those interested in the details of how the foster and court systems might work -both logistically and more emotionally- I do want to shed a little more light on the situation while still keeping the details and participants anonymous),
it was also ruled yesterday that the goal for her brothers is no longer reunification, but has changed to adoption and the process of termination of parental rights has been started.  And Dad was told in no uncertain terms that though the baby is a separate case, and though in essence he has been given a second chance with her being that she just came into care, given the family history with DCS, time is of the essence with this baby girl and if he wants to get his act together and father this child he needs to show that now.  The judge was adamant that this will not drag on with her as it has with the boys and she (the judge) will not be dealing with this two years from now this time around.
The judge was awesome. She struck a beautiful balance between putting Dad in his place (he can get a little mouthy), respecting his place and feelings in the situation, and laying out the facts.  She was up front about the priority here and urged him in a grave manner to really look within himself and figure out where he's at in his life, where he wants to be, what he is capable of and more importantly- what he wants to be capable of, and to truly, truly try to picture what is best for all of his children.  And to go from there and do what needs to be done.

We have a permanency plan meeting scheduled for later this week, which will spell out exactly what Dad needs to be doing, including a time frame, to work toward having his baby back with him.
As for now, we're her foster family -resource family as the state likes to call us now- and she's with us for the ride.
I'm so glad we get to love her through this. ♥

Please continue prayers for this situation.  And for Dad.  He had a rough day yesterday. 
And for Miya's brothers... they've been in the same pre-adoptive foster home for most of this two years and are doing well, but they were in the courtroom yesterday with us and it was visibly hard for them.  They're at an age where they're old enough to understand everything (probably too much) but young enough that it's still really really hard and confusing and hurtful.  Please pray for their foster mama, that she knows how to best love them through this too.


Mom said...

Praying as you requested.God is faithful,and sees/knows the big picture of course.Trusting is the key.XOXOX

Chrissy said...

It is so hard to watch a family fall apart, isn't it? When they say ever adoption or foster placement begins with a huge loss, they sure do mean it. I will never EVER forget the way my thee's bio Mom looked as she held her baby for the first and last time. Never. I pray for her and for her heart and that they will be reunited someday in heaven.

I'm so proud to "know" you and watch as you serve Jesus while loving on this precious gift.

Beanski said...

Wow. I just can't imagine. You guys are awesome for doing it! The world need more people like you"

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