But we had so much fun...
Saturday, October 31, 2009
happy night
My internet is acting up tonight, so I'm going to hold off on posting all the Halloween stuff for now... here's a peek at the aftermath. Well, the aftermath of the costumes anyway, not the aftermath of chocolate and sweets completely covering -and I mean completely covering- my living room floor. It's ridiculous, really.
But we had so much fun...
But we had so much fun...
Friday, October 30, 2009
rain rain go away
I am
So
Very
Tired
of
This
Rain.
And I'm from the Pacific Northwest, so you know it must be bad if I'm saying that. We don't drown easily.
In our area here, I heard last week that we were over the yearly average of rainfall by about 8 inches. Pretty much that entire 8 inches has been in the month of October. In comparison, normally the wettest month of the year is November with an average rainfall of 4.06". Last week when I heard that report, I think at that point we'd had like 8.75 inches of rain this month. And that was a week ago. I think since then we've had rain almost every day and we got up to 3 more inches dumped on us last night. I woke up in the middle of the night and I'd never heard it raining so hard. For a good fifteen minutes... I was honestly surprised the kids didn't wake up. It's still raining this morning. Flooded roads everywhere.
So we're a little water logged.
And sick of being indoors. It's no fun to go anywhere when you have three kids to get in and out of the car in the pouring rain. And it's been cold and gray and dark and dreary. I don't think we're supposed to be coming down with Seasonal Affective Disorder by October.
There's a mom from Sawyer's speech class and I guess they just moved here this summer as she was commenting that she was questioning their move with all this gross weather. Us other moms were trying to convince her that the fall season here isn't normally like this, that this is by far the wettest October in the record books for St Louis, that we often have beautiful warm indian summer type Octobers. Apparently you give some and you take some.
The last two years we've been out in short sleeves and sunshine on Sawyer's birthday... last year he was too warm in his bear costume on Halloween and Savannah trick-or-treated in her short sleeved little Goldilocks dress just fine.
This year we're praying for a single dry day, wearing golashes and bundling up. Yuck.
So
Very
Tired
of
This
Rain.
And I'm from the Pacific Northwest, so you know it must be bad if I'm saying that. We don't drown easily.
In our area here, I heard last week that we were over the yearly average of rainfall by about 8 inches. Pretty much that entire 8 inches has been in the month of October. In comparison, normally the wettest month of the year is November with an average rainfall of 4.06". Last week when I heard that report, I think at that point we'd had like 8.75 inches of rain this month. And that was a week ago. I think since then we've had rain almost every day and we got up to 3 more inches dumped on us last night. I woke up in the middle of the night and I'd never heard it raining so hard. For a good fifteen minutes... I was honestly surprised the kids didn't wake up. It's still raining this morning. Flooded roads everywhere.
So we're a little water logged.
And sick of being indoors. It's no fun to go anywhere when you have three kids to get in and out of the car in the pouring rain. And it's been cold and gray and dark and dreary. I don't think we're supposed to be coming down with Seasonal Affective Disorder by October.
There's a mom from Sawyer's speech class and I guess they just moved here this summer as she was commenting that she was questioning their move with all this gross weather. Us other moms were trying to convince her that the fall season here isn't normally like this, that this is by far the wettest October in the record books for St Louis, that we often have beautiful warm indian summer type Octobers. Apparently you give some and you take some.
The last two years we've been out in short sleeves and sunshine on Sawyer's birthday... last year he was too warm in his bear costume on Halloween and Savannah trick-or-treated in her short sleeved little Goldilocks dress just fine.
This year we're praying for a single dry day, wearing golashes and bundling up. Yuck.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
batoblomo
So we all know November is National Blog Post Month, inciting bloggers around the world to post every day for the month of November. I've participated the last two years and yes it's challenging, but I'm always glad I did it and it's always fun! (it'd be more fun if I'd ever actually win some prizes!!)
I've been looking forward to it this year as I'm anticipating it to be a much greater challenge -and good for me- as I've been such a slacker blogger lately... and I've heard that sentiment resounding in my blog circles the past couple of months.
Well, Nicole and I have been talking, trying to come up with ways to motivate ourselves and all our old bloggy friends, to not only jump on the NaBloPoMo train, but to really let the month of November serve as a way to figure out how to rearrange our priorities, our time management, and kick start a new habit of getting back to the old basics of blogging regularly.
So without further ado, we're proud to announce that as of now, this November is not only NaBloPoMo, but is the month for our BaToBloMo as well. It's a Back To Blogging Movement! Thirty days of blogging in the hopes of getting back in the habit of regular writing.
To help those of us who are lacking in blog fodder, or are just too overwhelmed with I'm so behind in blogging, where do I start?, Nicole and I have compiled a list -a schedule of sorts- full of back up topics when needed. If you're joining us in this venture, don't feel obligated to follow these days, it's simply here as a suggestion if you're drawing a blank on what to post for that day. I'll still be posting my own regular journalling/blog content here, but I'll refer to the day of the week to fill in blanks or add to my daily posts.As of now, here's our conglomeration of topic ideas...
some of them area already daily memes floating around the blog world, some are ones we just made up--
Mondays: "Not Me Mondays" (blog about mis-haps embarrassments)
Tuesdays: "Top Ten Tuesdays"(make a top ten list for whatever you want)
Wednesdays: "Wednesday Works" (share something of the old "works for me" school of thought or share a project you're working on, want to work on, need help with or even share a behavior/habit you or your family is working on)
Thursdays: "Thoughts for Thursdays" -of course!- (blog about a topic of opinion)
Fridays: "Flashback Fridays" (blog about a memory or even photo from the past)
Saturdays: "Saturday Social" (share new or favorite websites or blogs you come across)
Sundays: "Sunday Survey" (random questions)
As I said before, these are just suggestions and loose ideas to fall back on. You can take and run with it however you want!
However, the whole BaToBloMo is the MAIN idea... so all on board, say yes!
(and grab our little badge to add to your blog too!)
and hey, let me know if the badge doesn't work for you... i'm new at this stuff!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
in the pot
Quick! We're going to go through a big push for more recipes for our blog collection in the next few weeks so I can have enough to make a good little book... watch for a few more categories coming in the next little bit. Send me all your favorites, don't be shy! While you're at it, make the recipe and send me some pics of the yumminess if you can!
This call is for crock pot/slow cooker recipes... perfect time of year!
Email me your recipes and pics to notes4heather (at) yahoo (dot) com.
Thanks!
(as always, check out the sidebar for past categories and know we'd appreciate any additional recipes you can share to bulk up our little cookbook!)
This call is for crock pot/slow cooker recipes... perfect time of year!
Email me your recipes and pics to notes4heather (at) yahoo (dot) com.
Thanks!
(as always, check out the sidebar for past categories and know we'd appreciate any additional recipes you can share to bulk up our little cookbook!)
Thursday, October 22, 2009
sometimes
Sometimes I feel like the luckiest person in the world.
And other times I feel like the rug could be pulled out at any time.
Sometimes I am so astounded that I am living the life I am that I can barely breathe. I can hardly believe that it is me who gets to have this wonderful husband, two beautiful and healthy, incredible kids, a big comfortable home, a good church, a supportive family and some pretty incredible friends.
It brings me to my knees.
But in the back of my mind there's something always there. Something not letting me completely, entirely, whole-heartedly soak it all in. Something that believes- I don't know what. That it's too good to be true? Too good to be true for very long anyway.
Something that wants to be prepared for when I wake up and find it's all been a dream.
When is it all going to fall apart?
I'm terrified of losing my husband.
I'm positive I could be diagnosed with cancer at any time. And if I'm not, I'm sure my husband or my kids will be.
I'm worried he will be out of a job again and this time we won't be so lucky*.
I'm waiting for some unknown to come along and suddenly, we don't really have this big comfortable home.
I felt like this after I met Ryan. He's too good, it's too right, we're too happy.
I felt like this after our wedding. How did I stumble into such an awesome marriage?
I felt like this for months after we bought our first house. When are they going to call and say the bank made a mistake, it's not really ours?
I felt like this again moving down here. This was too easy, it all fell too simply into place, we're too comfortable here.
I feel like this watching my children. How did we so accidentally end up with two such beautifully perfect kids**?
Again, like it's all a dream.
I keep feeling like one of these days I'll be married long enough (isn't seven years long enough??) or have been a home owner long enough, or be reminded that these children are a gift to me enough times that I'll get over it. It'll have to eventually sink in that this is my life, right? At some point I'll get the fact that my life is good.
Why am I waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop?
Why should I fear being waken from this "dream"?
Why do I feel maybe I don't deserve this life? That we don't deserve to be this content.
It's not like I live in fear.
I don't think about this often. But it is one of those things that's kind of just always hanging out quietly in the back of my head. Like trying to avoid eye contact with it.
Because if I look directly at it, if I pay attention to it, it can get ugly.
If I let it, it can be so scary.
Grace. Peace. Trust.
I need these. I need to remember to ask for these.
I need to be willing to embrace these.
I need to know, whether the rug is under me or not, that I'm okay. That we're okay.
I do know that.
Matthew 7:9-11
You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you trick them with a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give what is good to those who ask him.
It's just that some days, that knowledge is quieter than the taunting of the wannabe rug-puller.
-------------
*I know 'luck' had nothing to do with it.
**Please know I don't mean 'beautifully perfect' in the literal, anyone-who's-not-their-mother- sense... you know what I do mean, right?
And please know that I'm not claiming some peachy picture perfect painting of our life... it's the same everyday mess as the next family. I just mean being happy overall; to know how blessed I've been and how grateful I am for this life we've ended up in together as a family. That is what I'm incredulous to believe sometimes.
And afraid to trust.
And other times I feel like the rug could be pulled out at any time.
Sometimes I am so astounded that I am living the life I am that I can barely breathe. I can hardly believe that it is me who gets to have this wonderful husband, two beautiful and healthy, incredible kids, a big comfortable home, a good church, a supportive family and some pretty incredible friends.
It brings me to my knees.
But in the back of my mind there's something always there. Something not letting me completely, entirely, whole-heartedly soak it all in. Something that believes- I don't know what. That it's too good to be true? Too good to be true for very long anyway.
Something that wants to be prepared for when I wake up and find it's all been a dream.
When is it all going to fall apart?
I'm terrified of losing my husband.
I'm positive I could be diagnosed with cancer at any time. And if I'm not, I'm sure my husband or my kids will be.
I'm worried he will be out of a job again and this time we won't be so lucky*.
I'm waiting for some unknown to come along and suddenly, we don't really have this big comfortable home.
I felt like this after I met Ryan. He's too good, it's too right, we're too happy.
I felt like this after our wedding. How did I stumble into such an awesome marriage?
I felt like this for months after we bought our first house. When are they going to call and say the bank made a mistake, it's not really ours?
I felt like this again moving down here. This was too easy, it all fell too simply into place, we're too comfortable here.
I feel like this watching my children. How did we so accidentally end up with two such beautifully perfect kids**?
Again, like it's all a dream.
I keep feeling like one of these days I'll be married long enough (isn't seven years long enough??) or have been a home owner long enough, or be reminded that these children are a gift to me enough times that I'll get over it. It'll have to eventually sink in that this is my life, right? At some point I'll get the fact that my life is good.
Why am I waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop?
Why should I fear being waken from this "dream"?
Why do I feel maybe I don't deserve this life? That we don't deserve to be this content.
It's not like I live in fear.
I don't think about this often. But it is one of those things that's kind of just always hanging out quietly in the back of my head. Like trying to avoid eye contact with it.
Because if I look directly at it, if I pay attention to it, it can get ugly.
If I let it, it can be so scary.
Grace. Peace. Trust.
I need these. I need to remember to ask for these.
I need to be willing to embrace these.
I need to know, whether the rug is under me or not, that I'm okay. That we're okay.
I do know that.
Matthew 7:9-11
You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you trick them with a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give what is good to those who ask him.
It's just that some days, that knowledge is quieter than the taunting of the wannabe rug-puller.
-------------
*I know 'luck' had nothing to do with it.
**Please know I don't mean 'beautifully perfect' in the literal, anyone-who's-not-their-mother- sense... you know what I do mean, right?
And please know that I'm not claiming some peachy picture perfect painting of our life... it's the same everyday mess as the next family. I just mean being happy overall; to know how blessed I've been and how grateful I am for this life we've ended up in together as a family. That is what I'm incredulous to believe sometimes.
And afraid to trust.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
consumer opinion
I'd like to know if any of you have...
(and if you have, please share your experience!)
used Soapnuts
owned a Saturn (or even more specifically a Saturn Outlook)
owned a Toyota Sequoia
used the pedi-egg thingie
read any really good parenting books lately
installed your own hardwood (laminate) floors (and what kind)
gone cold turkey and canceled your cable service
a really good recipe for a creamy lemonny pie -NOT lemon meringue
gone from being a two-car-family to one
brought home a puppy without telling your husband
(and if you have, please share your experience!)
used Soapnuts
owned a Saturn (or even more specifically a Saturn Outlook)
owned a Toyota Sequoia
used the pedi-egg thingie
read any really good parenting books lately
installed your own hardwood (laminate) floors (and what kind)
gone cold turkey and canceled your cable service
a really good recipe for a creamy lemonny pie -NOT lemon meringue
gone from being a two-car-family to one
brought home a puppy without telling your husband
i'm thinking...
I'm thinking that I just might not leave my pj's today.
Absolutely nothing on the agenda today -what a novel idea!!-, except for taking Sawyer to preschool. Sounds like a good excuse for a pajama day...
I'm thinking of all the friends I'd love to see when we're home in Portland. Kind of bummed I won't be able to squeeze it all in. I'd love a month there to just hang out...
I'm thinking about going for a nice long walk. I walked a little extra after walking Sawyer down to school. It's the perfect day for it, but I also had big plans for making some headway on things here at home today, so I cut it short. Now I'm sitting her looking out the window wishing I would have just nixed the housework for another hour of walking. And I just layed Caleb down...
I'm thinking that I can't wait to bake apple crisp tomorrow for small group. I might have to run out and grab some vanilla ice cream to go with it :)...
I'm thinking of more ideas for Sawyer's birthday celebration...
I'm thinking that I absolutely cannot believe that we're almost to the end of October. Seriously, was it not just June, like yesterday?? Where did this year go?!?
What's on your mind today?...
Absolutely nothing on the agenda today -what a novel idea!!-, except for taking Sawyer to preschool. Sounds like a good excuse for a pajama day...
I'm thinking of all the friends I'd love to see when we're home in Portland. Kind of bummed I won't be able to squeeze it all in. I'd love a month there to just hang out...
I'm thinking about going for a nice long walk. I walked a little extra after walking Sawyer down to school. It's the perfect day for it, but I also had big plans for making some headway on things here at home today, so I cut it short. Now I'm sitting her looking out the window wishing I would have just nixed the housework for another hour of walking. And I just layed Caleb down...
I'm thinking that I can't wait to bake apple crisp tomorrow for small group. I might have to run out and grab some vanilla ice cream to go with it :)...
I'm thinking of more ideas for Sawyer's birthday celebration...
I'm thinking that I absolutely cannot believe that we're almost to the end of October. Seriously, was it not just June, like yesterday?? Where did this year go?!?
What's on your mind today?...
Monday, October 19, 2009
in better news
We had a great weekend around here...
My sister's been here since last Tuesday. She spent a few days down at Fort Leonard Wood for her boyfriend's graduation from basic training (or something or other)(I know, I'm a bad sister for not technically knowing that!), and how convenient was it that this was two hours away from us?! So she was back here with us for the weekend, and just in time for some gorgeous weather.
(I am so excited that fall is back! For the next few days anyway.)
Saturday we needed something to do. It was sunny but still too cold (for my taste) to be outside. We realized we don't personally have much of an arsenal of fun STL things to do with visitors indoors, being that so many of the great and beautiful things are outdoors, and also that most of our visitors are during the summer. So I hopped online Saturday morning to try and find something for us to do. I thought I remembered hearing that the circus was in town so I searched that out, found some good tickets, with $5 off coupons on top of it, and we headed downtown to the circus! It was actually really really fun as none of us adults could remember ever being to the circus... and the kids were stoked! We had a great time. I'm waiting to steal pics from my sister... hopefully I'll share them later.
Sunday we went to church and then introduced Trish to our family tradition of lunch at good ol' Costco. :)
We spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying the nice(r) weather and the boys actually got some bikeriding in.
Today Ryan was home for the morning so while Sawer was at school, us grown ups and the baby did some birthday/Christmas shopping. Afterward, we picked Sawyer up from school and went out to lunch before taking Ryan out to the airport. He's off gallavanting around the country again for work for the week.
Say a prayer for our cars while he's gone.
The weather today was gorgeous... 75 degrees and beautiful. The kids spent most of the afternoon outside, loving our second chance at fall.
Tomorrow we have a crazy day. I won't even bore you with the lengthy list of to-do's. All I can say is everything is so packed in my schedule I have no wiggle room... nothing can go wrong, nothing can run late, because it'll just throw the three dozen other things off. Ugh.
BUT!
If I can get through tomorrow, I'm looking forward to a nice quiet week after that...
knock on wood!
My sister's been here since last Tuesday. She spent a few days down at Fort Leonard Wood for her boyfriend's graduation from basic training (or something or other)(I know, I'm a bad sister for not technically knowing that!), and how convenient was it that this was two hours away from us?! So she was back here with us for the weekend, and just in time for some gorgeous weather.
(I am so excited that fall is back! For the next few days anyway.)
Saturday we needed something to do. It was sunny but still too cold (for my taste) to be outside. We realized we don't personally have much of an arsenal of fun STL things to do with visitors indoors, being that so many of the great and beautiful things are outdoors, and also that most of our visitors are during the summer. So I hopped online Saturday morning to try and find something for us to do. I thought I remembered hearing that the circus was in town so I searched that out, found some good tickets, with $5 off coupons on top of it, and we headed downtown to the circus! It was actually really really fun as none of us adults could remember ever being to the circus... and the kids were stoked! We had a great time. I'm waiting to steal pics from my sister... hopefully I'll share them later.
Sunday we went to church and then introduced Trish to our family tradition of lunch at good ol' Costco. :)
We spent the rest of the afternoon enjoying the nice(r) weather and the boys actually got some bikeriding in.
Today Ryan was home for the morning so while Sawer was at school, us grown ups and the baby did some birthday/Christmas shopping. Afterward, we picked Sawyer up from school and went out to lunch before taking Ryan out to the airport. He's off gallavanting around the country again for work for the week.
Say a prayer for our cars while he's gone.
The weather today was gorgeous... 75 degrees and beautiful. The kids spent most of the afternoon outside, loving our second chance at fall.
Tomorrow we have a crazy day. I won't even bore you with the lengthy list of to-do's. All I can say is everything is so packed in my schedule I have no wiggle room... nothing can go wrong, nothing can run late, because it'll just throw the three dozen other things off. Ugh.
BUT!
If I can get through tomorrow, I'm looking forward to a nice quiet week after that...
knock on wood!
just another day
I'm so discouraged today.
Got some news that was so not up there on my Things I'd Like to Hear Today to Make My Day Better list.
Other news we're waiting to hear that may or may not be on that list as well. That's a fun one to wait for.
All in all, not having the best week.
My little sister has been here visiting this past week and while I think she had a decent enough time -hopefully at least a mostly relaxing vacation-, I know I haven't been the best of company. I don't feel like our house is the most relaxing place to be as of late.
But maybe it's just me.
I'm uncharacteristically seriously stressed out.
And in a funk.
And maybe a wee depressed.
And feeling
Completely
Over
Whelmed.
For the most part, I think I've gotten comfortable in the swing of things around here day to day; juggling an infant all day and our schedules and our busy evenings and all of that.
Shall I break it down for you? I know you care :)
We're currently devoting about 5 hours a week to our foster care/adoption training right now... but that's just one night weekly of class time. Then there's reading and homework during each week and a few home visits with our assessor over the course of this nine weeks to complete our homestudy. I also have homework for my weekly women's bible study that's supposed to be done daily (edited to add; I just decided I'm dropping out of that) and now we just started a new book study for our church based small group -of which Ryan and I are the leaders- which has a good bit of "homework" and prep work between our Thursday evening meetings too. And I'm still coordinating crafts and activities for MOPS twice a month. Savannah has homework each evening, cheer once a week, piano once a week, and Ryan has soccer. Weekday mornings I shuttle Sawyer to preschool twice a week and speech therapy two mornings as well. That's all in between and around MOPS and Bible study.
We had a garage sale the weekend before last.
And three different houseguests in the past nine days.
I've been better about grocery shopping (and even couponing and cutting our bill!) and planning and making meals lately. I've been better about keeping the house somewhat neat and tidy (because I have the mom I babysit for here twice a day during the week so my home needs to at least somewhat presentable!!), and I'm actually caught up on laundry.
All of that to say that I feel like, even with the insane amount of busy we've got going on, I've figured out a decent balance to our day-to-day.
But.
It's the overwhelming stuff I'm so behind on (still! from the crazy summer!! followed by the busy fall...) and burdened with that is killing me. All the stuff that is just constantly in the back of my mind, sitting on my shoulders, pressing me down:
Like the lastthree months YEAR of pictures I've mostly never edited, organized or even transferred.
Or my dining room that is just trashed with piles of craft stuff that just gets shoved out of the way when I finish a project.
Or the dozen projects started and never finished.
The boxes downstairs of junk moved out of said dining room at the last minute when having company over for dinner.
Papers to go through, mail to sift through.
The piles of outgrown kids clothes in my bedroom to go thru and pack away.
The boxes of baby clothes downstairs that I meant to go thru for my sister two months ago.
A pile of books to collect addresses for and ship off.
Gross, please nobody look too closely bathrooms that need desperately to be deep cleaned.
A tiled kitchen floor that needs it's grout cleaned soooo badly.
A bathroom cabinet I want to redo.
A fireplace surround I want to stain.
Those last two just aren't going to happen.
Oh, and don't forget the holidays are coming. And I already have every weekend on my calendar full until after Christmas. Sheesh.
Oh, and blogging. :)
Like I said, I feel like I'm just now able to juggle and keep my head above water in the every day around here. I don't have a clue how I'm supposed to have the time or energy to get the stuff I'm so behind on done. Or the extra stuff coming up. If all the stuff I'm behind on could be -POOF!- magically caught up... I think I'd be good. I can handle the pace of life right now without it.
But I'm not without it.
I feel like it's hovering there. Waiting for me. And I try to ignore it because I just don't have time. Almost as if I'm pretending if I don't look over that way, if I just don't acknowledge that wave bearing down on me, I won't drown.
But I think all this ignoring is culminating into a breakdown. Building up to a flood. An avalanche. Whatever you want to call it.
A little mini-breakdown already tried to make an appearance the other day.
Some guy I live with here talked me off the edge though.
And now he's out of town for the week :(
So there you go- yet another post about the crazy of my life right now, about the busyness I'm swimming in and about the blogging I want to be doing, but don't.
Except for the blogging about howcrazy busy I am. Apparently I can manage that at regular intervals.
I'll get back to normal one of these days.
Right?
p.s.
I'm not looking for pity or for solutions (unless you want to hire me a maid!)...
I was just needing to vent. Thanks for humoring me.
Got some news that was so not up there on my Things I'd Like to Hear Today to Make My Day Better list.
Other news we're waiting to hear that may or may not be on that list as well. That's a fun one to wait for.
All in all, not having the best week.
My little sister has been here visiting this past week and while I think she had a decent enough time -hopefully at least a mostly relaxing vacation-, I know I haven't been the best of company. I don't feel like our house is the most relaxing place to be as of late.
But maybe it's just me.
I'm uncharacteristically seriously stressed out.
And in a funk.
And maybe a wee depressed.
And feeling
Completely
Over
Whelmed.
For the most part, I think I've gotten comfortable in the swing of things around here day to day; juggling an infant all day and our schedules and our busy evenings and all of that.
Shall I break it down for you? I know you care :)
We're currently devoting about 5 hours a week to our foster care/adoption training right now... but that's just one night weekly of class time. Then there's reading and homework during each week and a few home visits with our assessor over the course of this nine weeks to complete our homestudy. I also have homework for my weekly women's bible study that's supposed to be done daily (edited to add; I just decided I'm dropping out of that) and now we just started a new book study for our church based small group -of which Ryan and I are the leaders- which has a good bit of "homework" and prep work between our Thursday evening meetings too. And I'm still coordinating crafts and activities for MOPS twice a month. Savannah has homework each evening, cheer once a week, piano once a week, and Ryan has soccer. Weekday mornings I shuttle Sawyer to preschool twice a week and speech therapy two mornings as well. That's all in between and around MOPS and Bible study.
We had a garage sale the weekend before last.
And three different houseguests in the past nine days.
I've been better about grocery shopping (and even couponing and cutting our bill!) and planning and making meals lately. I've been better about keeping the house somewhat neat and tidy (because I have the mom I babysit for here twice a day during the week so my home needs to at least somewhat presentable!!), and I'm actually caught up on laundry.
All of that to say that I feel like, even with the insane amount of busy we've got going on, I've figured out a decent balance to our day-to-day.
But.
It's the overwhelming stuff I'm so behind on (still! from the crazy summer!! followed by the busy fall...) and burdened with that is killing me. All the stuff that is just constantly in the back of my mind, sitting on my shoulders, pressing me down:
Like the last
Or my dining room that is just trashed with piles of craft stuff that just gets shoved out of the way when I finish a project.
Or the dozen projects started and never finished.
The boxes downstairs of junk moved out of said dining room at the last minute when having company over for dinner.
Papers to go through, mail to sift through.
The piles of outgrown kids clothes in my bedroom to go thru and pack away.
The boxes of baby clothes downstairs that I meant to go thru for my sister two months ago.
A pile of books to collect addresses for and ship off.
Gross, please nobody look too closely bathrooms that need desperately to be deep cleaned.
A tiled kitchen floor that needs it's grout cleaned soooo badly.
A bathroom cabinet I want to redo.
A fireplace surround I want to stain.
Those last two just aren't going to happen.
Oh, and don't forget the holidays are coming. And I already have every weekend on my calendar full until after Christmas. Sheesh.
Oh, and blogging. :)
Like I said, I feel like I'm just now able to juggle and keep my head above water in the every day around here. I don't have a clue how I'm supposed to have the time or energy to get the stuff I'm so behind on done. Or the extra stuff coming up. If all the stuff I'm behind on could be -POOF!- magically caught up... I think I'd be good. I can handle the pace of life right now without it.
But I'm not without it.
I feel like it's hovering there. Waiting for me. And I try to ignore it because I just don't have time. Almost as if I'm pretending if I don't look over that way, if I just don't acknowledge that wave bearing down on me, I won't drown.
But I think all this ignoring is culminating into a breakdown. Building up to a flood. An avalanche. Whatever you want to call it.
A little mini-breakdown already tried to make an appearance the other day.
Some guy I live with here talked me off the edge though.
And now he's out of town for the week :(
So there you go- yet another post about the crazy of my life right now, about the busyness I'm swimming in and about the blogging I want to be doing, but don't.
Except for the blogging about how
I'll get back to normal one of these days.
Right?
p.s.
I'm not looking for pity or for solutions (unless you want to hire me a maid!)...
I was just needing to vent. Thanks for humoring me.
Friday, October 16, 2009
for today
Copied from the always inspirational Ali Edwards, this was a great excuse for a blog post in the midst of my slump. Feel free to do the same if you need a reason to blog today... I love reading these!
Outside my window... it's gray and drizzly... again. A whole week of rain and cold. It feels like winter (forecasted high of 49 tomorrow), only the trees are still full and mostly green. That's just not right. I think Fall forgot about us this year. Which is really too bad because the past two Autumns here have been my favorite weather wise...
Outside my window... it's gray and drizzly... again. A whole week of rain and cold. It feels like winter (forecasted high of 49 tomorrow), only the trees are still full and mostly green. That's just not right. I think Fall forgot about us this year. Which is really too bad because the past two Autumns here have been my favorite weather wise...
I am thankful for... a warm house, a day off
In my kitchen... I'm putting a pot roast in the crock pot for today. Yum. My kitchen is actually spotless right now... my amazing hubby made sure all the dishes were done after our dinner guests last night and I woke up to a clean kitchen!
I am wearing... gray yoga pants and a black t-shirt with barefeet. I need to get dressed to go meet my sister at the car rental place this morning. Boo.
I am creating... a list in my head of what to accomplish today with no baby.
I am going... to get my hair cut today :)
I am reading... The Doctor's Wife, Praying with Power, the book of Esther, and lots of foster care blogs :)
I am hoping... my kids stay well.
I am hearing... The Mr. Men Show on the tv. Sawyer LOVES these guys (and girls)... Mr. Happy, Mr. Strong, Little Miss Chatterbox, etc. And I love the nostalgia from back in my day :)
Around the house... We've been cleaning and organizing. Changing over summer clothes to winter, purging for garage sale and charity, reorganizing the pantry, et cetera, et cetera.
One of my favorite things right now... hot apple cider on the stove.
A few plans for the weekend... family time, a possible reunion, a little shopping and checking a few more things off my to-do list.
A picture to share...
This was awhile back on a road trip (I really haven't taken any pictures lately :( ).
Sawyer had a sticker activity book and instead of making faces in the book, he decided to change up his own face. I looked back and he was wearing about five noses, a few sets of eyebrows, a couple of hairbows and hats and what looks to be stitches in his chin.
He can always make me smile!
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
so...
It used to be that life unfolded as a series of blog posts for me.
Even as events were happening, I was writing about them in my mind, as a way to get through them if they were unwelcome or to celebrate them if they were wonderful.
Now, more and more, I just experience them, and after they are over I have a hard time remembering the little things that made them so special or so frustrating.
The everyday things just slip away so easily.
I'm not sure how to get back into that mindset. How to get back into the habit of recording things here for my memories.
I keep thinking, when life slows down... when I get caught up on all the things I have to get caught up on around here...
But it's been three months now since I've done any regular kind of blogging and I'm just not sure life is ever going to slow down for me. It's looking like this is the new normal around here.
I need to regroup. I need to recharge. I need to renew.
But when?
Even as events were happening, I was writing about them in my mind, as a way to get through them if they were unwelcome or to celebrate them if they were wonderful.
Now, more and more, I just experience them, and after they are over I have a hard time remembering the little things that made them so special or so frustrating.
The everyday things just slip away so easily.
I'm not sure how to get back into that mindset. How to get back into the habit of recording things here for my memories.
I keep thinking, when life slows down... when I get caught up on all the things I have to get caught up on around here...
But it's been three months now since I've done any regular kind of blogging and I'm just not sure life is ever going to slow down for me. It's looking like this is the new normal around here.
I need to regroup. I need to recharge. I need to renew.
But when?
Monday, October 5, 2009
checking in
It was sure a beautiful fall weekend around here. We didn't have a ton going on, but stayed busy all the same. Lots of family time, lots of relaxing, lots of just enjoying a great weekend together...
Friday after piano lessons, we met up with some friends for dinner at Chik-fil-A. We ended up spending over two hours in the restaurant just chatting with the kids playing. At one point Sarah and I left the dads to keep an eye on the kids in the play place and wandered over to World Market for to grab a couple of goodies. Good friends, good conversation, good shopping and a great evening!
Saturday we all slept in a little and then I spent some quality alone time at Target and Michael's. That's always a welcome reprieve! Got the rest of the supplies I needed for our Boo deliveries this week.
Came home and had a great lunch and spent the afternoon riding bikes and spending some time outside in the cool crisp sunshine. Ryan and Sawyer had a little guys night that evening as Savannah had a birthday party (her first real slumber party!!) and I had a mom's night with our MOPs group. We had a game/trivia night and it was really fun. Tons of great laughter and tons of great food.
(I made this dip to share and put it on a tray with graham cracker sticks, chocolate graham crackers, mini nilla wafers and STRAWBERRIES. The strawberries with this dip are the absolute yummiest!!)
Sunday after church we hit up Costco for lunch and some groceries and then met Mike, Kasey and Evan back at our house to hang out for the afternoon. Kasey and I are gearing up for a garage sale this weekend and so they brought a load of stuff out and we got to spend the afternoon together, love on Evan a little and finish up with some yummy orange chicken for dinner! Meanwhile, the sun was shining, the air was nice and cool and crisp and it was just about the perfect fall weather you could ever order up.
Too bad I haven't had any time to do any actual fall baking this morning... Mmmm, I'm so in the mood for that!
Friday after piano lessons, we met up with some friends for dinner at Chik-fil-A. We ended up spending over two hours in the restaurant just chatting with the kids playing. At one point Sarah and I left the dads to keep an eye on the kids in the play place and wandered over to World Market for to grab a couple of goodies. Good friends, good conversation, good shopping and a great evening!
Saturday we all slept in a little and then I spent some quality alone time at Target and Michael's. That's always a welcome reprieve! Got the rest of the supplies I needed for our Boo deliveries this week.
Came home and had a great lunch and spent the afternoon riding bikes and spending some time outside in the cool crisp sunshine. Ryan and Sawyer had a little guys night that evening as Savannah had a birthday party (her first real slumber party!!) and I had a mom's night with our MOPs group. We had a game/trivia night and it was really fun. Tons of great laughter and tons of great food.
(I made this dip to share and put it on a tray with graham cracker sticks, chocolate graham crackers, mini nilla wafers and STRAWBERRIES. The strawberries with this dip are the absolute yummiest!!)
Sunday after church we hit up Costco for lunch and some groceries and then met Mike, Kasey and Evan back at our house to hang out for the afternoon. Kasey and I are gearing up for a garage sale this weekend and so they brought a load of stuff out and we got to spend the afternoon together, love on Evan a little and finish up with some yummy orange chicken for dinner! Meanwhile, the sun was shining, the air was nice and cool and crisp and it was just about the perfect fall weather you could ever order up.
Too bad I haven't had any time to do any actual fall baking this morning... Mmmm, I'm so in the mood for that!
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